Saturday 22 September 2012

Bullying


It is a sad world we live in if someone considers being asked nicely to consider the feelings of others bullying. It should not be an imposition on anyone to be respectful. It doesn't take long to put yourself in someone else's shoes before saying something you can't take back or posting something without thought to how others will feel.

Freedom of speech never has and never will be the right to say whatever you want, to whomever you want, whenever you want and damn the consequences. It’s a right to information. Nobody is saying you aren’t entitled to an opinion; but why is it so cumbersome and why do people act like they are being victimised when asked to consider people’s feelings other than their own. We live in a community, be that our immediate one or the global one of the Internet.

Everyone is entitled to an informed opinion, but nobody is entitled to hurt others. Everybody’s opinion is important to them but nobody’s opinion is more important than someone else’s on a global scale so why is it that difficult for some people to be considerate of other’s feelings. It is not hypocritical to suggest that everyone's opinion is important. Some people don’t seem to realise how much words can hurt. How being bullied leaves scars that no matter how much you try to deny them are there and live with you every day of your life. That they affect decisions you make, who you choose to trust and what you choose to share with people. Life isn’t high school; we all did that stint, so why do some people continue to make us feel like we are reliving that experience all over again.

Everyone has the right to feel safe and respected. Respect has always been extremely important to me. I would never intentionally make someone feel the way I’ve been made to feel at various times in my life, and if I ever do it’s completely unintentional and I’m deeply sorry. However I will not be treated like crap for standing up for the right to be treated with the same respect that you yourself would wish from those around you. Attacking my character is uncalled for and threatening to unfollow me is unnecessary. If you don't like my polite requests for equal consideration maybe you should consider why you don't like them instead of attacking me. Maybe you just don't like the reflection you are seeing in my words. Either way don't take it out on me, or put words into my mouth; I'm not looking for a fight. I'm not interested in arguing; all I'm interested in is people treating others the way they would wish to be treated. And I for one wish to be treated with respect.

I take the time to respect your right to your opinion. If respecting someone’s opinion means not doing or saying something around them than I am happy to do that because I can’t conscionably ask the same in return if I am not willing to do so myself. Is it really too much that I ask the same in return? 

FYI I believe this regardless of the topic in question. For example I don't drink but would not tell someone else they can't. I don't like spoilers for certain shows, but even if I did I would remind people to tag for those who don't. I believe within the bounds of the law everyone is entitled to live their lives their way and that nobody has the right to say otherwise. I believe everyone should be born to the same base rights regardless of gender, race, sexuality, religion or political leanings. I always try to consider others before I act. There are many topics that if they are broached with me online I will take to a private conversation because I don't want to offend others reading it. Some people may see this as over the top or unrealistic but this is how I choose to live my life. I'm not however asking or expecting others to live by my rules; just to show basic common courtesy. We do after all have to share this planet.

~*~
***Star Trek Voyager: Message in a Bottle***
Seven: State your reasons for making these modifications.
B’Elanna: “State your reasons, please." lt's not what you say, Seven. lt's how you say it.
Seven: l don't understand.
B’Elanna: You may have noticed that some of the crew seem a bit...on edge when you're around.
Seven: l was Borg. l elicit apprehension.
B’Elanna: No, that's not what l mean. We're not afraid that you're going to assimilate us. We're just not used to... You just... You're rude.
Seven: l am rude.
B’Elanna: Yes. Yes. You order people around; you do things without permission; and whether you realise it or not, you come off as a little insulting. You don't even say "please" or "thank you." Look, l don't expect you to change overnight, but try to remember that we are not just a bunch of drones.
Seven: Your attempt to recalibrate the interface is ill- advised. The risk of disrupting our link is too great.
B’Elanna: ln your opinion. That is exactly what l'm talking about. You haven't even been listening to me.
l don't know why l try to talk to you if you don't even...

1 comment:

  1. Dear Katrina, thank you for this greatness of soul and spirit that is yours. If everyone had your vision, the world would be perfect.
    I could not be more in tune with what you said and anyone who has a modicum of common sense would agree. But as I said that supposed to have common sense and minimal hindsight to agree with the fact that if someone wants people to respect his opinions it also implies that he should respect others' opinions. Respect works both ways, it's not a one-way highway!
    If someone is really convinced by his opinions he has no reason to be afraid to discuss them...But if his beliefs in his own opinions are fragile, it takes just the fact that we have different opinions than his as an insult! So the right question would be "Is it the fact that we have different opinions from his that bothers him or is it the fact that his not able to discuss them that does?" Then those people should admit that the right to have an opinion is not their only privilege, it's everyones right. Is someone discussing their right to breath? That's pretty much the same!
    And finally, it is a DISCUSSION, not a fight, we're not in a box ring where they should be a winner and a loser, it's JUST a discussion, it's what CIVILIZED people do without insulting each other or behaving like children in kinder garden. If someone is not able to do that, he should be questionning himself not the others!!!

    PS: My apologies for the mistakes, English is not my 1st language but this debate is so close to my heart that I had to say a word about it!

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