Stop stealing art

Pirating and stealing an artist’s work rather than paying for it undermines the entire creative process and the artist's right to make a living from their art. Your right to see/read/hear/own a copy of their work does NOT precede the artist's right to make a living. You have a right to see/read/hear/own it when you pay for it! To steal their work for your own convenience is selfish not to mention criminal. You wouldn’t walk into a store & steal off the shelves so what do you think gives you the right to steal an artist’s work online. 

Those of you who choose to pirate and steal an artist’s work clearly have no compassion or gratitude for all the hard work, talent and heart that goes into bringing us their work.

If you wish artists to keep creating the books, music, etc that you enjoy you have to pay for them. If you wish your favourite artists to keep producing work stop stealing from them. Have some respect; not only for the creative process but the hard working, talented people behind the art, because without their vision there is no art. 

#iheartheadlock

To whom it may concern,

Nothing is more important to an indie film than the love, blood, sweat & tears of the creator. This & more went into the making of Headlock. Mark doesn’t just make films he creates art, the title of which is a huge part of this creation & the cornerstone by which the film has come to be known across social media since its inception in July 2014. For just over four years Mark, cast, crew, fans & film buffs alike have been posting, following the film’s journey & anticipating the release of the film under the name Headlock across Twitter & Instagram. It’s something we are all passionate about & none more than Mark himself. As the person who wrote, directed & stared in Headlock he is intimately connected to this film at every level & a lot of thought went into giving the film a name that did it justice. That name is Headlock. 

The instant I heard the title Headlock I was intrigued by what talented filmmaker Mark Polish would unleash on the world. Headlock is unique, it draws you in & it sparks the imagination. Having had the honour of viewing Headlock I can say without a doubt that this title suits the compelling story of brain trauma perfectly. By contrast ‘Against the Clock’ is mundane, generic & sparks no sense of imagination. My first thought was actually ‘sports’. Mark’s artistic vision is incredible & with that comes a title as unique & intriguing as his work. This vision should be respected in its entirety.

We all know the film as Headlock, we all love the title Headlock & for four years we have been following the journey of & looking forward to the film Headlock. It’s heartbreaking to see a production company try to undermine a filmmaker’s artistic vision & for what, the sake of alphabetical order... I don’t know anyone who picks a movie based on where it falls in the alphabet or who is so incredibly lazy that they won’t scroll past ‘A’. Is it your intention to only produce films that start with ‘A’? 

I will never understand why production companies think they have a right to change anything about the work they have been trusted to release to the public. If you don’t like something about a project don’t agree to take it on; once you do you do so as a whole. By changing the name, especially four years after it’s creation, you are not only stealing Headlock’s identity you are risking the success of the film. Not everyone spends endless hours online & as such there is bound to be a percentage of people who awaiting the release of Headlock will miss it as they aren’t looking for the release of a movie called ‘Against the Clock’. This is an unacceptable risk. Mark & his team have worked long & hard to bring this incredible film to audiences & the built in audience have been anticipating the release of Headlock. 

Please don’t change the name of Headlock to some generic claptrap that has no sense of adventure, has nothing to do with the story being told & ultimately disrespects Mark. This film is his vision & Headlock is the title, the only title, that does justice to his vision. 

#iheartheadlock

#saveshadowhunters

The last thing I expected to see trending when I checked Twitter on my lunch break at work was #saveshadowhunters 

As far as I’m aware this is a popular show & it’s not usual for Netflix shows to be treated as carelessly as network shows. But more than that it is an important show; probably the most important show to hit our airwaves since Star Trek: The Original Series paved the way for a franchise that remains relevant today. 

I can’t think of any show since Star Trek that is so socially relevant & does so with such honesty & integrity, which is in large part thanks to Cassandra Clare’s ‘Shadowhunters: The Mortal Instruments’ series of books the show is based on. A series that requires at least one more full season to do the six books justice. 

Using a supernatural backdrop to tells its stories Shadowhunters doesn’t discriminate with its three dimensional characters that are representative across gender, race & sexuality. The characters & story arks are well fleshed out taking us on a journey we can invest in. We get to see not only the character’s strengths & successes but their flaws & vulnerabilities as well, all of whom are brilliantly brought to life by the actors who portray them. The relationships be they friendship, family or romantic are realistic as they go through the ups & downs of any relationship. The women in the show support each other rather than acting like competition to keep at arm’s length. And through it all the show tackles social issues with natural storytelling that isn’t forced or political but simply human (& Shadowhunter, vampire, werewolf, warlock, seelie & demon). 

To say that the cancellation of Shadowhunters is a loss is an understatement. The importance of this show in a world that has lost its way & amidst a generation who has taken the fight for equality in a misguided direction is immense. It takes a special ability in storytelling to bring nuance to social issues without feeling like you are being preached to. Cassandra Clare & the team behind Shadowhunters have this ability; such a shame to let it go to waste. 

Be sure to check out all the books in Cassandra Clare’s Shadowhunters universe for more adventures with the characters you’ve come to care about. 

Wisdom teeth

A week later & I still feel traumatised. And no I don't think that is too strong a word for having had four difficult wisdom teeth removed. The aching was annoying but nothing I haven't had to put up with before. It's everything else that is doing my head in. They nicked something that connects to my nose while in there so I can’t blow it until mid next week so as to avoid damage. I couldn't use a straw in the first week (again re causing damage) which would have made drinking so much easier in those first few days. I hate laying on my back but I am not yet game to put the pressure from my heavy headed sleeping on my cheeks plus I toss & turn when not in a forced position. Brushing my teeth is hard & I hate having food stuck in my teeth so I'm still nibbling everything with my front teeth. Eating has never been my strong point & I'm the person who has rarely eaten on my left side in over 20 years as it's the last side I lost a tooth from & I could never bring myself to chew with the gum all tender & now I'm being told to just eat normally, it's fine. I don't think people understand just now not fine it is to try & eat normally when I've had my gums cut into, my lower lip is still partially numb & all my teeth feel like they have been rearranged. It feels like I'm gumming my food & the closest I've come is chips. It's not fine. It's far from fine & I honestly don't know how long it will be before I'm brave enough to try eating with my molars again. I just need my mouth to feel normal...

General PSA

For those who haven't noticed; I do NOT think like you! Stop painting me with your brush & assuming that my motivations are the same as yours because you will be wrong every single damn time. I am not in the slightest bit interested in competing with the world, I do not think I'm better than you & I do not post from a place of self interest. I want what is best for everyone, because we are all human & all have to share this planet. The fact that so many people get so defensive over the idea that they consider things from a neutral perspective instead of a personal one says way more about you than it does me.

Like everyone else I have my own beliefs, opinions, likes & dislikes but my solution isn't to all be me it's to let everyone be themselves. I don't have to believe in something for it to be true to someone else. I don't have to partake in something for those around me to partake in it. I don't have to like something just because you do. And vise versa. Your actions outside of yourself have consequences. I'm not asking you to do anything more than consider them before acting. Your words can't be taken back & they do leave scars on others even if you can't see them. Luckily I don't care what you think of me so your words don't hurt me, but your actions do offend me when you think you have a right to treat people like garbage.

Also by the time I give my opinion on such things I've already considered numerous different points of view & have choosen the one that I feel is beneficial to many. Just because most people think about themselves first doesn't make that my motivation.

News flash we are all humans & the Earth revolves around the sun. Grow up & start being part of the whole instead of thinking everything is about just you. Just because something doesn't directly affect you doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

The personal attacks on my character need to stop. I am none of the things people keep accusing me of. All I want is a better place for all. I am not the enemy so quit treating me like one. I'm not the world's punching bag for those not open to a point of view that is collective rather than singular. If you can't have a civil, intelligent conversation without personal attacks you are not welcome on my posts. If I wasn't the person I am just consider that you could have been responsible for depression or suicide by now. Be glad I don't take thinks personally but rather socially.

I am not after pity I'm after the same respect that you yourself expect.

New Year Revelation

Let's make this the year terrible things do not happen before people understand they are important. The year when people care because it is the right thing to do: not a fad or for personal gain. The year when we come together as humans to embrace not only our oneness but the differences that make us unique and special. If you only care when there is a headline or a celebrity endorsement you are part of the problem. Instead make every day a day for equality, acceptance & caring. Make a difference! Make your actions count, because words can only go so far. Make this the year that we stand up to governments, bigots and extremists. It’s time to say enough is enough, because if we don't nobody else will. Our rights to choose and be safe are fundamental; it’s time to stop putting personal beliefs and outdated documents ahead of society. Stand up, be a voice of change. Stop being passive and reactive and start being proactive in making this world a better place for all. Raise the next generation to take care of this planet and all that live here. Complacency is no longer an option! Compassion, understanding, acceptance, selflessness and respect are key to a brighter future. Be part of the change; don’t sit back and watch life happen only to complain about it later.  

Everyday Feminism

Just because the surface is clear doesn't mean the underlying current is. Yes it is great for people to speak up for women’s rights and debunk the stigma surrounding the terms feminism and feminist. But to only take part in or notice of the fight when a celebrity has given a speech and go back to doing nothing when the hype dies down is an affront to women everywhere.

It is insulting to act as though women's rights only matter when endorsed by a celebrity. The fact that some people are only willing to get behind a cause because it's attached to a celebrity and for as long as it is prominent in the media is sad. Women's right to equality is worth more than a celebrity endorsement; our lives are not marketable commodities. Our rights to equality and to be taken seriously are not on par with shampoo, cat food and coffee. 

Do you have any idea how heartbreaking it is to tell people how they are hurting you, themselves or others and be dismissed only to see those same people take notice when someone they don't even know personally tells them the exact same thing. How depressing it is that your opinion is seemingly worth less to those who care about you than that of a stranger. 

If people need celebrity endorsement to understand or share the importance of human rights then this planet is seriously more screwed up than most realise. People should know that equality and in this case specifically feminism are important because they are female or know females. It should not only be important for as long as the hype of a celebrity's speech is in the media. It should not only be important simply because of fame period. It is more than acceptable to speak out without the need of someone holding your hand. If you are only sharing because 'OMG it's XXX' you are missing the point of this important issue. This is an issue that needs to be addressed and noticed every single day because we live in the 21st century and it's long overdue that women are treated equal to men. The general public may not have fame but by ignoring the message because it doesn't come from someone famous is insulting to everyone trying to make this world a better place. Our voices are just as important. Our struggles just as significant. This needs to be important every day because if only celebrity's comments are treated as important than it diminishes the overall importance of the cause. Take a stand not because a celebrity told you to but because it is the right thing to do. Be part of the solution every day, not just when it’s made trendy to do so. 

And if you think it is easy being a feminist out of the limelight think again. I may not have experienced anything as serious as death or rape threats but I deal with harassment and rudeness on a regular basis for voicing my beliefs and standing up for my rights.

·       I have been accused of soap boxing

·       I have been told I take things too seriously and read too much into everything

·       I have been told I'm a man hater

·       It's been assumed I must be gay

·       I have been told too many times: ‘that’s just how it is’, ‘it was just a joke’, ‘you’re only one person’, ‘why don’t you just stop’

Human rights are something I have been passionate about since I was three. Respect, equality & self-worth are infinitely important to me. And yet people still attack me over my beliefs and praise celebrities for saying the exact same thing. How does that even make sense! To mock, hate or ignore feminism is to perpetuate the problem. The fact that equality and feminism still offends people or is something to be complacent about is an insult to females everywhere. 

Quit being a sheep, open your eyes, dig deeper, see beyond the surface and fight for equality because it is the humane thing to do. Take equality seriously, it's not a fad or something to forget about when the media buzz wears off. Women you are worth it. Men you have women in your lives. Stand up for them, stand with them and speak out! 

Depression and suicide

We live in a world where negativity is rife and the apparent need for competition in some is like the need for air. But life is not a competition it’s about finding *your* happiness, not trying to duplicate someone else’s. There is so much negativity and neediness online these days that it’s often hard to tell whether someone is genuinely suffering or simply seeking attention. How often must someone repeat the same positive messages to you before you believe them? Why would a person choose to talk to you regularly or in some cases every day if they didn’t like you? Why is it so hard to accept a compliment and believe the good in yourself instead of constantly believing the bullies of the world and hating yourself instead?

Depression is a silent illness fought by so many and yet when something like suicide rears its head do people ban together to help combat this often silent killer… No, they take it as an opportunity to once again assert the need for competition and fight over the morality of suicide, a competition nobody is ever going to win because the very concept of taking one’s life is such a personal one. So instead of making this about morals or personal beliefs, which nobody is ever going to agree on, why don’t people take this as yet another opportunity to spread awareness of mental illness? Tweet the number to the suicide hotline in your country along with any organisations that help those with depression. Offer to listen to those who want to talk. Let people know they are not alone. Make trending count for something and hashtag suicide or depression in these tweets.

Instead of choosing to divide society take this as an opportunity to work together and collectively get behind a cause that many share. Help reduce the stigmatism that still surrounds mental illness and just maybe more people will admit they have a problem, seek help and not wind up committing suicide. Don’t waste another opportunity to make this a priority by bickering and attacking each other’s opinions.

Help in Australia:

Lifeline (24 hour support line): 13 11 14

https://www.lifeline.org.au/Get-Help/Get_Help?gclid=CPGI6u-wksACFVgTvQodG3MA3w

Beyond Blue – depression and anxiety support http://www.beyondblue.org.au/

Greedy Hollywood Needy Hollywood

In light of the cast of The Big Bang Theory demanding more money I feel this is an important issue to voice given they aren't the first and they won’t be the last.

This kind of mentality in Hollywood is appalling. Nobody needs the amount of money those in Hollywood receive in a lifetime let along a year or per movie, especially when there are so many people struggling or going without. The Big Bang cast is currently reportedly on $350,000 an episode, which based on say 22 episodes a season is $7,700,000 a year; how is that not more than enough!

"According to the Bureau of Labour Statistics, the median wage for workers in the United States in December 2013 was $786 per week or $48,872 a year for a 40 hour work week."
http://jobsearch.about.com/od/glossary-a/a/average-salary.htm

So compared to their fellow US employees they are already earning over $300,000 more an episode than the average American does in a year. Do they not understand that people are struggling, that the minimum wage in the US is garbage? And sure they work long hours but so do doctors, nurses, cops, etc. Is there no compassion for the average person; the very roles that actors often take on to earn the exuberant amounts that they do? Shouldn't acting be about a love of the art, about expressing and sharing that love with the world, not egos and greed...

Consider if instead of increasing cast wages part of that money was redirected to the writers and crew (without them there wouldn't be a show), part was put back into the show and the balance was given to charity. Just imagine how much the world would change for the better if shows started donating to charities. They could even do so based on the show's theme:

• ·         Medical shows to medical research;
• ·         Cop shows to law enforcement;
• ·         Law shows to help people who can’t afford representation;
• ·         Science based shows to the advancement of science;
• ·         School shows to education and;
• ·         Family shows to helping those in need.

And yes, we as viewers help compound this issue by watching the shows and buying the merchandise, but that doesn't make it right. I for one feel the behind the scenes is as important to a show/movie as the finished product I am watching. This mentality gives me a bitter taste about shows I have otherwise enjoyed, because the integrity and compassion of those involved is as important to me as the story being told. It is why more than ever I am drawn to the world of indie where story is more important than money and ego.

Dear parents

I may not be a parent but I am someone's child and I don't understand why parents think they or their kids are failing when they don't live up to certain expectations. You know what they are doing; being themselves! And they certainly don't have to live up to outsiders' expectations; every child learns and develops at their own rate. They are not necessarily going to like the same food as you or even a big range of food, especially early on. Taste and texture can be huge obstacles to overcome; try asking your child what they don't like about something. They are not necessary going to like anything just because you do. Their behaviour isn't naughty simply because it doesn't meet expectations of how someone should behave. Maybe they have a neurological condition that means they see the world differently, (Asperger’s Syndrome, Autism, ADHD) which a doctor could help identify. But regardless of anything else that may be going on they are simply being their unique, individual selves; something that should be encouraged. There is a difference between following the rules and a developing personality, please don't mistake the two to the detriment of your child's ability to be themselves. You need to teach them to think, not what to think. Just because they aren't a clone of you doesn't automatically make them fussy, naughty, stubborn or any of the other negative labels people place on children. What we have come to call stubborn is really someone wanting to do things the way they feel comfortable doing them. That is not automatically wrong, it's just different. You may not always understand their way of thinking or doing things, but they are not always going to understand yours either, it’s about compromise and seeing things from everyone’s point of view. Learn to read your child and understand their needs, encourage their way of learning, doing, being instead of thinking you or they are a failure, because as parents you are the people who will instil them with confidence, self-love and the ability to be a functioning individual who can think for themselves. Don't take that away from them by expecting them to be what you want to see or think they should be. If they can't trust you to accept them for who they are, who can they trust? It may not be easy, but it's not meant to be. If it were meant to be easy we wouldn't be raising individuals but clones. You have created a brand new person and you have to learn who they are right along with them. All you can do is give them boundaries, teach them actions have consequences and love, provide and be there for them; everything else is all them, you can't change who they are and why would you want to… 

Open letter to governments

To those in power,

Governments exist and representatives are elected to protect the people and better the nation. At least in theory... What we see more often however is the very people who are supposed to protect our interests, see the bigger picture and implement a better future using their power to cultivate their own goals, based on their own beliefs. Religion and its personal belief systems are kowtowed to at the detriment of human rights. The rich get richer and the poor get poorer. The future is ignored in preference for what you can gain for yourselves in the present. This kind of attitude is not sustainable nor will it pave the way for a better tomorrow.

Religion has no place in politics; it is a personal belief system that is interpreted differently by each person who follows their chosen religion. They are called human rights, not human privileges and it is high time the government stopped pandering to religious fanatics who believe that rights are based on demographics and what makes them comfortable. If you don’t approve of the gay community then don’t marry someone of the same sex. If you are pro-life rather than pro-choice don’t have an abortion or sign a living will. Put yourself in someone else’s shoes and ask yourself how you would feel being told who you could love and what you could and couldn't do with your own body. It is not your choice; it is each individual’s personal choice. It is time for governments to stand up and say that starting now human rights are born rights.

Distribution of wealth is shoving an even greater wedge between the rich and poor, haves and have nots, well off and struggling. As a society, especially one that wishes to have a sustainable future, we need to take care of our own. Not everyone can be rich, it is impossible and unsustainable. The rich and those in power need to understand that this world and one’s right to live in it are not exclusive to them. Public schools, public health, government pensions, etc are part and parcel of maintaining a healthy economy and society. We cannot live in a world where only the rich are entitled to further education and medical care because to ignore the majority of the population in favour of the elite is ignorant and shameful. Instead of deciding which people have the right to each facility and instead of telling society that cuts will have to be made to sustain the country how about the politicians take a massive pay cut, because you cannot justify to anyone but yourselves that you are worth the salary you receive on top of all the free perks and exuberant retirement funds.

Being in politics is not and should not be about you. It is and should be about the people that you are sworn to protect, the economy you are sworn to manage and the future you are sworn to uphold. If you cannot leave your personal beliefs at the door than you have no right to be in politics; because it is not about protecting, benefiting and funding only those who can afford it and that agree with you.

We are one but we are many

If you’re content with the world and your place in it that’s fine, and I’m not being condescending, the world is made up of countless different people. But just as you don’t wish to rock the boat you have to equally accept that there are people who are going to stand up for the injustices in this world.

I am one such person and I have been since I was three and my parents were my only audience. I will not live my life fulfilling other’s expectations or conform to the social norm to be liked. I will not sit by and watch my friends continue on their missions of self-hate because society has made them believe they are not good enough. I will not sit in silence while some people have rights because they were “lucky” enough to be born into a certain demographic. You know who you are lucky to be: YOU.   

I believe that everyone should be born with the same rights, and that nobody has a right to impose their own personal beliefs on others. Our life choices are our own; they should not be legalised by religious groups or influenced by bullies. Question why someone wants to prevent you from having rights (because it makes them uncomfortable), why they are putting you down (to make themselves feel better) or trying to sell you a given product (to make money) rather than blindly believing and/or accepting something on face value and then stubbornly refusing to see why you suddenly hate yourself or want something. Be self-aware.

I will not tell somebody what they should watch, read or listen to, etc nor will I threaten to not be your friend or claim there is something wrong with you if you don’t. If I make a general recommendation you can take it or leave it. If I make a specific recommendation to you it is based on your interests; you don’t have to like it or even follow it up. I don’t care if you like/enjoy the same things as me and know I’m not always going to like/enjoy the same things as you. Doesn’t mean we can’t be friends

I will not tell somebody not to do something just because I don’t, that is my personal life choice and mine alone. If you don’t like something don’t do it, it really is that simple, but don’t think you have the right to tell someone else that they can’t do it because it is against your beliefs or makes you uncomfortable: “Tolerance does not mean tolerating intolerance”.

You are entitled to whatever opinion you want. What you are not entitled to do is impose it on someone else. You live your life and let others live theirs. And to those who say ‘but I’m entitled to my opinion’ realise that you are basically telling everyone who disagrees with you that they are not entitled to theirs, sometimes legally, because it upsets you.

It is not a soap box or a moral high ground to do the right thing and want everyone to have the same rights and to believe in themselves. Would you so quickly try to knock down the Nelson Mandelas, Martin Luther Kings and Ghandis of the world? Do you verbally attack women’s and gay right activists?

I am simply being a voice so many are too scared to be. Without people who speak up then only straight, white, Christian men would still have rights. So the next time you want to put me down for standing up to the bullies of the world consider whose side you're really taking by doing so. If you’re offended by my drive for people to believe in themselves and equality rather than self-hate and discrimination that says way more about you than it does me. And trust me when I say if you don’t like what I do say you’d hate what I don’t say. However, I truly believe that you are just as entitled to your life choices and personal  happiness as I am so why would I judge your decision to do/ not do something any more than it is up to you to judge mine. Our differences are what make us unique.

Change doesn't happen through silence, it happens through taking action. Take back the power and stop letting the bullies of the world win. 

At the end of the day if you don't like what I have to say unfollow me.

Respect, compassion, equality and individuality are what I live by.

Weight

Let me start off by saying that I quite frankly don’t care what you think of me for posting this, because I am flat out sick of the double standards. I constantly see all these posts and articles about how insensitive it is to seemingly even utter the words overweight or obese but apparently it's perfectly ok to single out celebrities in magazines for being too thin and to brush off those with fast metabolisms as whiners. PSA: under and overweight are potentially unhealthy and both can be a continuous struggle. How is it bullying to suggest an overweight person seek help but it's a public service to highlight the anorexic... How is singling out the thin in magazines not bullying when if that were done to the overweight there would be a public outcry. What sort of world do we live in where it is ok to not only publicly expose those suffering from being underweight/anorexic and socially correct to encourage them to seek help but bullying to suggest the same to an overweight/obese person. We live in a world where people are bombarded with the fact that they should all be thin but people are scared to even suggest that someone is too big yet have no hesitation in saying that someone is too small from a health perspective (do people not see how messed up all these contradictory claims are). Why is it ok to ask thin celebrities about their eating habits during interviews but an outrage to ask the same of a larger celebrity (neither are the interviewer’s business). It’s hypocrisy to say that one is helping and one is bullying when singling out a person’s weight, because quite frankly if you are doing anything more than trying to help a person for health reasons it’s bullying; it’s really not a wonder this world is rife with body image issues. So many people are always on about having compassion and that people come in all sizes. Well you know what small is a size too and just because it invokes jealously in people doesn't make it right to plaster magazines with the anorexic who are struggling with a disease or brush off those who eat well but struggle to maintain weight any more than it is ok to bully the overweight/obese. A healthy weight has nothing to do with clothing size but your BMI (Body Mass Index) based on weight versus height. Until people realise this we will continue to live in a world where people are bullied for their size instead of being encouraged to be healthy. Surely it is more important to be healthy and happy than it is to be a size zero. Instead of publicly bullying others how about people start taking stock of their own health and body image because size zero doesn't always equal healthy and size 14 doesn't always equal unhealthy. It all depends on the individual. We need to stop talking about weight in terms of ‘shaming’ & start taking responsibility for our own lives because shame is internal not something inflicted on you by others. Stop blaming others for your feelings & your life. Start discussing weight in terms of health, because until we do we won’t open a dialogue on the important issues, we will continue to throw pity parties & blame everyone else for our choices. 

Stop stealing indie films

Uploading artists work online so that people don't have to pay or wait for the physical or digital release undermines the entire creative process and the artist's right to make a living from their art. Your right to see/own a copy of their work does NOT precede the artist's right to make a living. You have a right to see/own it when you pay for it! Independent artists are essentially self-funded. You are stealing directly from them by providing their work freely. 

Furthermore uploading only certain actor's parts of a film not only diminishes the work of all the other talented people involved it misses the point of the film, which can only be understood in its entirety. If illegal uploads increase significantly when a certain actor is in a film they may be an asset for their talent but YOU are turning them into a financial liability by making them high risk actors. So since many of you clearly have no compassion for the film-makers and all the hard work, talent and heart that goes into bringing us their work you may have somewhere inside you a shred of compassion for the actors you claim to admire and start supporting their work by supporting the entirety of the film instead of stealing from the creators to feed your obsessions. 

To love indie film is a passion. They are not backed by multi-million dollar studios or churned out regularly like Hollywood films; not that I'm condoning stealing Hollywood movies. If you wish to see them you have to be patient. If you wish indie film-makers to keep creating these beautiful films you have to pay for them. If you wish your favourite actors to keep getting work stop stealing the films they are in. Have some respect; not only for the creative process but the hard working, talented people behind the films, because without their vision there are no films. 

PS. I don't care what country you are from. Film-makers do not work to feed your obsessions, they work to tell stories. I'm from Australia and that makes it just as difficult for me to see indie films as for many of you; but you know what I travel and I wait. And I am happy to wait because I know that the films are worth it and that in supporting the artists I'm helping them do something they love, something they generously share with us for us to love. 

Celebrities are people too

What is wrong with certain so called fans these days that as soon as a celebrity says or does something they don't agree with they hate on them. Celebrity is a title given to someone whose job is in the public eye, it does NOT define who they are. They are PEOPLE like the rest of us and it is YOU who put them on pedestals and then abuse them when YOU knock them off. As people they are just as entitled to their opinions as you or I. Being a fan doesn't mean that you have to agree with everything they say and do. But being a fan does mean you should respect them and their right to their opinion. They are not here to cater to your every whim and nor can they be expected to be exactly who you or anyone else expect them to be. They are their own people with their own opinions, tastes and beliefs. By hating on them and ceasing to be fans you are basically suggesting that they are to give up their right to an opinion when they enter the public eye. Celebrity doesn’t mean that a person should be silenced. Do you wipe your friends and treat them like crap when they don’t like or do the same things as you…

So next time someone you are supposedly a fan of does something you don’t agree with you have two choices: 1/ ignore it and understand that everyone is different or 2/ childishly (ie publicly) ditch them because they aren’t the mindless drone you wanted them to be. At no point is abusing them an option. 

What’s really sick in all this

You know what's sick: not that Mark Polish made a beautiful film with an actress you like but that those of you who didn't like it continue to follow Mark on twitter or stalk his tweets lying in wait for any new post because you are hell bent on letting him know how much you hate him and/or FLO at every opportunity. What’s sick is the way many of you treat Stana; you may claim to be defending her but many of you are really just being disrespectful to two people.

Mark is not obsessed with Stana he is a filmmaker who cast an actress for a film. It is many of you who are obsessed and you are projecting that onto how you see everything Stana does and is. You stopped being simply fans a long time ago and now run on pure, blinding obsession. So many of you treat Stana like an object, a piece of meat to sexualise and demean at every turn and yet you condemn Mark for casting her in a role that showcases her talent, bravery and adventurous spirit, not just her beauty. 

FLO is a film and Mark and Stana are actors playing characters; it’s not real and yet Stana is the only actress I know of who is constantly condemned for doing her job. Stana is NOT Beckett nor is she really with 'Castle’. But there are so many who either seem to actually believe that Caskett are real or that Stana somehow belongs to Nathan that in doing her job anyone else with the ‘audacity’ to work with her are labelled. You just have to watch any of her roles to see that Stana gives them her all. She doesn't hold back and that is part of what makes her such a remarkable actress. It is disturbing how many people have blurred the line between actress and character.

To those of you who call FLO porn have you not seen all the tweets obsessed with Caskett having sex… Many of you seem to want Castle to air on HBO but you would condemn FLO as porn when there was only one sex scene, and it was the most respectfully, tastefully done sex scene I’ve ever seen on film. The entire film is incredibly respectful and beautifully showcases what it means to be in love and love is more than sex. You are offended by FLO but the idea of turning Castle into a porn show doesn’t seem to faze people. Hypocritical double standards again stemming from this blurred line between fiction and reality.

To those of you who condemn FLO for the affair, the film is so much more than that. Do you also condemn films that depict assault, murder, robbery, war, hate crimes, drugs, etc. In fact Castle, as a crime show, depicts many of these things and you don't condemn it.  

If you don't like FLO, and by association Mark, that is your choice; simply unfollow him or stop stalking his tweets. Don't read his interviews or watch FLO/HWML, but most importantly DO NOT treat him like garbage. Keep your disgusting comments to yourself and stop with the harassment. This is an incredible, talented, kind, generous person you are rubbishing and he deserves to be treated with respect. You are entitled to not like something or someone but that doesn't entitle you to use the anonymity of the Internet to be disrespectful, hurtful and downright inappropriate. By association you claim to be fans of Stana; do you really think she would appreciate your treating her friends this way. Stana has had nothing but positive things to say about her experience making FLO, she talks of trust and says she would do it again in a heartbeat, so stop projecting your feelings onto those involved in the film.

We get it you don't like it. Get over it and quit wasting your energy on hate and instead go and discuss the things you enjoy.

The only thing worse than bullying is defending your behaviour like you have a right to hurt others. You have NO such right! Your opinion is NOT more important than a person's feelings. If you are offended by such a notion than you seriously need to rethink your life choices. Freedom of speech is NOT the right to say whatever you want, whenever you want, damn the consequences. 

Forever Love

Grandma & Grandpa

Sixty years ago today Edwin Joy and Patricia Adams said I do and spent the next near 58 years building their lives together. With five kids (four boys aged 7, 9, 11 & 13 and a girl 2) in tow they boarded a boat in England and came to Australia where daughter number two was born seven years later. Here they established new roots and until the day they died they lived in the same house my dad grew up in and that numerous dogs throughout the years called home. Six kids have since grown to include nineteen grandchildren and one great grandchild.

My grandparents may not have been big on leaving the house, you had to visit them for the most part, but family was incredibly important to them. There was never a shortage of love at their house and regardless of the growing number of grandchildren ranging in age from myself at thirty (in 5 days) to four when Grandma died and seven months when Grandpa died they never seemed out of their comfort zone interacting with any of us. Family was in their blood; it came so naturally to them.

After nearly 58 years of marriage my Grandma passed away from cancer in 2011. Grandma was someone who I cannot remember being sick a day in my life, whom we all thought would be someone who saw 100, and one of the strongest women I’ve known so her diagnosis was a massive shock to everyone. One of the first things Grandma said after she was diagnosed was that she’d see Grandpa’s next birthday but not hers. She died six days after his birthday and six days before her own, living more approximately six months past doctor’s expectations. When she was nearing the end Grandpa told her that he would be joining her soon. After she died he stopped taking his medication and barely ate, but somehow his body managed to hold out just over three years when his heart and soul for all intents and purposes had died with Grandma. His wish was to be buried so the urn holding Grandma’s ashes was buried with him – together forever. I believe two things when it come to my grandparents’ passing: that through sheer determination Grandma kept her promise to see Grandpa’s next birthday and that Grandpa died of a broken heart. Theirs is a true love story and one I truly admire and am honoured to have witnessed.

Gun laws

RIP to the innocent victims of the Newton, Connecticut shooting.

This is just the latest in a long and unnecessary line of mass shootings in the United States. When is the US government going to wake up and realise that it shouldn't be about an individual’s right to bear arms, but about a society’s right to be safe. Their job is to protect their people, create a country in which everyone can live with the right to be safe and treated equally. Yet time and time again they prove that the antiquated right to bear arms is more important than the right of an entire nation to safely leave their house and take part in day to day activities that a lot of us around the world take for granted and don't think twice about. The Constitution was created in the 1700's. This is the 21st century and it's high time that the US government stopped treating this document like the be all and end all and understand that like anything else it has to evolve with the times. Just because something was relevant in the 1700's does not make it relevant in the 2000's. Move forward; don't get stuck in the past to the detriment of society and their safety.

Yes it is people killing people, but they are using guns and it’s high time that ease of access was removed. In Australia on 28 April 1996 one of the darkest days in our recent history occurred in the form of the Port Arthur massacre where 35 people lost their lives and 23 people were wounded. The Australian government made it their mission to ensure that this could never happen again and gun laws in Australia became strict and civilian guns were recalled. The Aussie people voluntarily gave up their guns and tight licensing policies were put in place. Cops, military and farmers are allowed to own guns and last I heard if a farmer leaves the land they must forfeit their gun and their license. Australia has not seen such an event since these laws were put in place. Laws put in place by a government who understood that society as a whole were more important than the individual beliefs of those who think that they should have a right to have a gun. In Australia you cannot just walk into a shop and buy a gun or ammunition and you most certainly cannot just get your hands on an automatic weapon. That is simply unheard of.

I don’t want the right to own a gun. I have never met anyone in Australia who wants the right to own a gun. In fact as a kid my brother and I were not even allowed toy guns and nor were we interested in them. So why is it that there are still enough people in the United States in the 21^st century who’s belief it is that they have a right to bear arms that they can basically control and manipulate the government into not making a decision that is necessary and beneficial to the safety of its people. Governments need to stop listening to individuals on certain issues and instead put society’s interests, safety and rights first. That’s their job; that is why we elect these people into a position of power, to do what is right by us. And what is right by society is that they can safely leave their homes without the fear that some gun wielding maniac with a grudge is going to open fire. That they can go to school, the shops, the cinemas, etc and not have to wonder if someone is going to kill them. I can’t imagine living in a country where I didn't know if doing these every day activities meant it could be my last day. Welcome to the 21^st century America, please join the rest of us.  

Respecting Celebrities

The Internet allows us the opportunity to communicate with people all over the world. It provides us the opportunity to connect with people in the public eye; an opportunity that is often taken for granted. Those in the public eye are not obligated to communicate with us; it is an honour not a right. They generously give of their spare time or down moments to do so and some people repay them by treating them like property, demeaning them, harassing them or generally being disrespectful and inappropriate.

What some of you seem to forget is that celebrities are real people with real feelings. They are entitled to private lives and down time and do not have to justify their absence to us, we don’t own them. Their professions may be in the public but their private lives are just that: private. What they choose to share with us is entirely up to them, what they don’t is none of our business. We do not have a right to their personal lives any more than anyone in our own lives has a right to pry into our own personal business. And just because someone is in the public eye doesn't mean that their children and families are. They should be free to be online like any one of us, without fans swarming. They did not choose the public life and we should respect that. If someone introduces their family members and states that it’s ok to interact with them than that is a different story.

Celebrities are not your girlfriends/boyfriends. Finding someone attractive and complimenting them on their looks is on thing. Making sexual comments online, particularly in their mentions is perverted. They are people, not meat and deserve to be treated with dignity not reduced to body parts. Would you really talk the way some of you do to/about celebs to someone you were actually dating? Because some of the comments, twitter locations, banners, DPs, and things that make it onto tumblr are downright disgusting. And just because you are a teenage girl does NOT make it cute. If a guy said some of the things I see teenage girls put out there they would have their heads bitten off. Double standard much!? How would you feel if someone said such things to you or your daughter/son as if you/they were nothing more than a sex object?

Just because we are fans of someone’s work doesn't mean they have to work on our timeline. It is their careers, their talent and visions that they generously share with us. They should be free to pursue the paths they choose on their own schedule, within the bounds of any professional contracts they may have. I for one would rather see something that they are proud of and that is meaningful to them than something they just churned out for the sake of it or to meet demands. Asking something over and over again isn't going to change the outcome. We don't know what is going on behind the scenes so why harass celebs over something they may have no control over. We are not the only people in the equation, have you ever considered how it makes them feel to see the repetitive questioning to things we don’t know the whole story on. Consider how you feel when someone constantly nags you about something. Being patient doesn't mean that you don’t admire someone’s work, but it does show respect for their feelings. If they have news relevant to the public they will share it in time, not on demand.

If you have the privilege of meeting someone in the public eye or receiving a DM from them the information that you receive as a result of such interaction is private. It is not a bragging right to share with the world at large. You have been entrusted with information, honour that trust and keep it to yourself! If a friend or family member shares something privately with you do you not honour that trust? How is it different if that trust is bestowed upon you by someone in the public eye? Just because they are famous doesn't mean they don’t have the right to be respected and their trust in you upheld.

Many celebrities have asked bluntly or more subtly for people not to spam them. They have so many mentions and to have to scroll through all the spam must get old. It also means the rest of us get lost in the onslaught and makes it harder for them to reply to people should they wish to. There are also boundaries that need to be respected. Their private lives are not our personal jungle gyms and to act as though they are is disrespectful and inappropriate. Like everyone else they are entitled to their opinions. If you don't like something they have to say you don't have to reply. If you don’t like someone’s work that’s fine, everyone has different tastes, but that doesn't give you the right to slander them online for it. There is constructive criticism and then there is bashing. The world really doesn't need more hate.

Celebrities are not pawns in your sick games of pit one person against the other. Everyone is entitled to have their favourites and everyone is entitled to make comments on someone’s talent. Nobody is right or wrong. If everyone liked the same things the world would be a boring place. However, trying to prove that your favourite is the best by slandering other celebs and their fans is disgusting. These are again real people you are bashing in the name of your own favourite. They have feelings. And you are hardly being a proud representative of a fandom when you assume that the person you are barracking for would be alright with you putting down their friends and co-workers in their name. Respect each other and those who are generous enough to share their talents with us. 

For people who claim to respect, love and admire these people some of you sure have a bizarre way of showing it. Just because you have the safety of a computer screen or other such device between you does not give you the right to be hurtful, disrespectful or inappropriate. Online persona is not an excuse. You are still choosing to act that way. There are boundaries and some of you run right on past them and don't stop for anyone or anything. People often talk about such behaviour ruining things for everyone else, and while this may very well be true I am personally more concerned about the feelings of those who are subject to such things on a daily basis than my own enjoyment of interacting with these wonderful people. I would not blame some of the celebs if they pulled away from social networking altogether with the endless crap that ends up in their mentions and only intensifies at the smallest of things. Mountains are made out of mole hills on an increasingly regular basis and at the brunt of the speculation, demands and gossip are real people with real feelings, people who don’t deserve to be treated this way. Like everyone else they have the right to feel safe online and if minimising their interaction online is what they need to do to avoid such things their happiness is more important to me than their continued generosity to communicate with us.

  

So before you go mentioning someone in the public eye put yourself in their shoes and ask yourself how you would feel if someone treated you like that. I’d like to hope that you would not wish to be treated the same way.

Bullying

It is a sad world we live in if someone considers being asked nicely to consider the feelings of others bullying. It should not be an imposition on anyone to be respectful. It doesn't take long to put yourself in someone else's shoes before saying something you can't take back or posting something without thought to how others will feel.

Freedom of speech never has and never will be the right to say whatever you want, to whomever you want, whenever you want and damn the consequences. It’s a right to information. Nobody is saying you aren’t entitled to an opinion; but why is it so cumbersome and why do people act like they are being victimised when asked to consider people’s feelings other than their own. We live in a community, be that our immediate one or the global one of the Internet.

Everyone is entitled to an informed opinion, but nobody is entitled to hurt others. Everybody’s opinion is important to them but nobody’s opinion is more important than someone else’s on a global scale so why is it that difficult for some people to be considerate of other’s feelings. It is not hypocritical to suggest that everyone's opinion is important. Some people don’t seem to realise how much words can hurt. How being bullied leaves scars that no matter how much you try to deny them are there and live with you every day of your life. That they affect decisions you make, who you choose to trust and what you choose to share with people. Life isn’t high school; we all did that stint, so why do some people continue to make us feel like we are reliving that experience all over again.

Everyone has the right to feel safe and respected. Respect has always been extremely important to me. I would never intentionally make someone feel the way I’ve been made to feel at various times in my life, and if I ever do it’s completely unintentional and I’m deeply sorry. However I will not be treated like crap for standing up for the right to be treated with the same respect that you yourself would wish from those around you. Attacking my character is uncalled for and threatening to unfollow me is unnecessary. If you don't like my polite requests for equal consideration maybe you should consider why you don't like them instead of attacking me. Maybe you just don't like the reflection you are seeing in my words. Either way don't take it out on me, or put words into my mouth; I'm not looking for a fight. I'm not interested in arguing; all I'm interested in is people treating others the way they would wish to be treated. And I for one wish to be treated with respect.

I take the time to respect your right to your opinion. If respecting someone’s opinion means not doing or saying something around them than I am happy to do that because I can’t conscionably ask the same in return if I am not willing to do so myself. Is it really too much that I ask the same in return? 

FYI I believe this regardless of the topic in question. For example I don't drink but would not tell someone else they can't. I don't like spoilers for certain shows, but even if I did I would remind people to tag for those who don't. I believe within the bounds of the law everyone is entitled to live their lives their way and that nobody has the right to say otherwise. I believe everyone should be born to the same base rights regardless of gender, race, sexuality, religion or political leanings. I always try to consider others before I act. There are many topics that if they are broached with me online I will take to a private conversation because I don't want to offend others reading it. Some people may see this as over the top or unrealistic but this is how I choose to live my life. I'm not however asking or expecting others to live by my rules; just to show basic common courtesy. We do after all have to share this planet.

~*~
***Star Trek Voyager: Message in a Bottle***

Seven: State your reasons for making these modifications.
B’Elanna: “State your reasons, please." lt's not what you say, Seven. lt's how you say it.
Seven: l don't understand.
B’Elanna: You may have noticed that some of the crew seem a bit...on edge when you're around.
Seven: l was Borg. l elicit apprehension.
B’Elanna: No, that's not what l mean. We're not afraid that you're going to assimilate us. We're just not used to... You just... You're rude.
Seven: l am rude.
B’Elanna: Yes. Yes. You order people around; you do things without permission; and whether you realise it or not, you come off as a little insulting. You don't even say "please" or "thank you." Look, l don't expect you to change overnight, but try to remember that we are not just a bunch of drones.
Seven: Your attempt to recalibrate the interface is ill- advised. The risk of disrupting our link is too great.
B’Elanna: ln your opinion. That is exactly what l'm talking about. You haven't even been listening to me. l don't know why l try to talk to you if you don't even...